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|Adam’s Ambition, Self-love & Self-pity…|
Adam’s Ambition, Self-love & Self-pity… Self-Knowledge and Repentance
Jesus Christ reveals thru Jacob Lorber – The Household of God
Volume 2, Chapters 41-43
1. And all who had sat down around Abedam’s (God, Jehova) basket once again thanked the Lord for having chosen them for it. He afforded them the inestimable grace of eating together with Him out of one basket, fruits of the glory of the Father’s love, and of drinking from one and the same vessel, the sweetest juice of life eternal.
2. They continued to praise Abedam for His sublime grace for quite some time, and while the surrounding baskets were already emptied by a little over a third, no one had so much as touched a fruit from Abedam’s basket as of yet.
3. However, since the glorifying and praising did not seem to come to an end, Abedam looked at His guests and told them to partake of the fruits, just like the guests around the other baskets, whereupon they entreated Him to be the first to reach into the basket. When Abedam complied with their wish, all of them put their hands in the basket, partaking with great joy and reverence of the fruits and emptying the vessels filled with juice.
4. And so, the meal lasted nearly an hour, but in spite of this, the baskets, as well as the vessels, did not seem to become empty, all the while the fruits became more and more aromatic and the juice in the vessels progressively more delicious and sweeter. The end of the meal was exactly as its beginning; no one wished to be the first to put his hand into the basket, and now no one wished to be the first to withdraw his hand from the basket. Since they saw Abedam Himself frequently reach into the basket, nobody thought of stopping; only Adam noticed that the sun was close to setting, and he asked the high Abedam what was to be done, since the time had come for the usual preliminary burning.
5. But in turn, the high Abedam asked Adam the following: “Adam, just tell Me, plain and simple, in whose honor this burning is to take place, whether in Mine, in honor of the blue sky and its stars that will become visible later and the still visible sun and moon, in honor of the people, or in honor of you alone?
6. “You see, I barely know what meaning you have ever attached to it, what you wish to attach to it now, or what you are already attaching to it; therefore, I wish to know more about it from you.
7. “This idle concern can hardly be aimed at Me, because if I ever wanted anything like that, I would have already demanded it from you a long time ago. So, since I do not want and intend anything like that at all, this being no concern of Mine, do tell Me honestly in whose honor this preliminary burning is to take place.”
8. And here, Adam’s tongue failed him, so much so that he could not utter a single word.
9. But Abedam made the following remark to Adam: “Adam, is it not a fact that you had the greatest joy in this preliminary burning and secretly related it to yourself, wishing to thereby indicate that the road to the gate of life leads only through you? So, the burning in your honor had to precede the burning in Mine, and you attached more importance to the timeliness of the preliminary burning than to the burning thereafter, which was dedicated in honor of Me!
10. “Behold, for this secret reason I had the sacrificial fire meant for Me take place when it was still morning, so as to free it from your great folly; nevertheless, you do not seem inclined to give up your old foolishness.
11. “Is the meal with Me not worth more than the preliminary burning in your honor? Therefore, let all of you stay around the baskets and eat and drink as long as you like, as long as you enjoy it! You may do so as well, Adam. However, should you prefer the burning to this living meal, you may even indulge in that pleasure; But you must take care while doing so, lest the fire grow too strong and easily seize and consume you! – Do you comprehend these words?
12. “I, however, tell you: Understand them well and consider that the earth is hollow on the inside, filled to the brim with the most bitter of fires, – after that, do as you desire, either unto death – or unto life! Amen.”
13. When Adam heard these words Abedam uttered, he became mightily alarmed and said the following to Him, trembling and full of fear:
14. “O Abedam, You are holy, good and full of love, grace and mercy; but woe betide him who would trespass by merely a hair’s breadth the boundaries of Your will, – for then he is already destined for death, because there is no golden mean with You, only two extreme poles, namely, the pole of life and the pole of death.
15. “Your living Word is also constituted that way, which, not knowing of gentle admonition, either builds worlds through its all-surpassing gentleness, or, vice versa, just as speedily destroys them again.
16. “Therefore, I ask You to be gracious and merciful towards me, who am weak; for what has already happened cannot be so easily considered undone. As such, be gentle with me and do not drive me any lower than I am already. Your holy will be done! Amen.”
17. Abedam replied briefly to Adam: “Adam, Adam, you talk much about yourself; but Me, you have completely forgotten!
18. “Do you even grasp what it means that I am here, on the most miserable spot in My infinite creation?
19. “What do you know of the eternally infinite holiness of God?!
20. “So please, have a quick change of heart and do not become immersed even more in the kingdom of death, but rather in My love and My great grace and mercy!
21. “If, so far, you have only discovered two poles within Me, then it is only your fault; but ask these newcomers, – they will tell you great wonders about the third, intermediate pole! Amen.”
1. After this short speech, Abedam promptly turned to the father of the nine poor ones, his name being Pariholi, and his family’s name was Pariholi Garthilli. The name means “the poor fellows”, for they have nothing, not even any ambition, but they live like the birds on God’s air with a happy-go-lucky attitude of trust. He said to him:
2. “Listen, My still quite poor Pariholi, would you dare, if it be My will, to tell the patriarch Adam, with the gentlest of words, that exactly that golden mean which, so far, he has not discovered within Me, is the most level path of My eternally loving will?”
3. Pariholi replied, thoroughly gripped by immense reverence: “O – You – exceedingly – exceedingly – exceedingly holy Jehovah, God and Creator of all things and Father of all Your holy angels and of many humans pleasing to You!
4. What other will of his own should the worm sitting before you in the dust have, save that which, at all times, issues from You?! Therefore, I shall certainly do what Your most holy will deems good and surely exceedingly expedient.
5. “However, even this is surely an incomprehensible condescension on Your part and the golden mean of all golden means, the fact that You mildly ask, even though You would only have to command it, owing to Your might.
6. “And also that You nevertheless wanted to become visible as a Father to us all – whether we are worthy or, what is the case for most of us, surely completely unworthy, in order to show us all the sole, true, and most enlightening golden mean of all life out of You. It leads everyone of some good will, O holiest Father, to Your heart, which, according to my still shaky understanding, is and will forever remain the eternal life!
7. “Hence, O You exceedingly – exceedingly – exceedingly holy Father, graciously refrain from asking me in future whether I might wish to fulfill Your most holy will somewhere or somehow, since I am an utter nothingness before You. Instead, simply give me a command in accordance with my capabilities, and my neck will, at all times, bow to Your most holy will!”
8. Thereupon Abedam said to Pariholi: “Listen, since you already realized this by yourself, you are quite suitable to be a messenger of love and life out of Me. So, go to Adam in My name; and when Adam asks you why you came to him, tell him what you know of Me, out of yourself!
9. “You may go now; in the meantime I shall awaken your family! You hear: I shall awaken them to life eternal!
10. “And when you return here, your children will receive you with invigorated arms. Now go and do as I asked! Amen.”
11. Pariholi promptly rose and walked the thirty paces over to Adam. He came to a stop before him, frozen like a pillar, mostly owing to his great respect for Adam, but also to his great taciturnity, for he had a clumsy tongue.
12. With great trepidation he awaited Adam’s well-known question. When Adam finally looked at him, asking the expected question (for this was an old habitual question of Adam), the erstwhile pillar almost turned into a reed for a while and began to mightily wobble and tremble, unable to utter even a sound. Only when Adam directed the same question at him for the second time, this time in a more rugged and thunderous manner, was Pariholi awakened in his spirit. He lost all of his fear and initiated a quite noteworthy speech to the patriarch Adam, which went as follows:
13. “Listen, father Adam, you unborn and first complete man of the earth, you who have taught us all through your children, who are closer to you than the likes of us; I tell you that Jehovah, the Holiest, is God and the most loving Father to us all, Who alone deserves all praise, all glory, all honor, all love and all worship, as well as all sacrifices. How could you, in front of all your children, who, without exception, had been taught by you, turn around and show us a completely different face from the one that we ought to be entitled to see, owing to your instruction to us all at the time when no mortal eye had ever seen Jehovah?
14. “But now that He, o wonder upon wonder, grace upon grace, goodness upon goodness, mercy upon mercy, visibly walks among us, teaching, guiding, feeding us and giving us to drink from the stream of His infinite fatherly love; now that He has come to us most miserable children in the midst of His immense leniency, bringing us dead ones such great promises and, if only we accept it, eternal life itself; only now do you dare show us how utterly empty your teaching to us was, and how little respect for God you had, failing to recognize exactly what it is within Him that brought Him to us in person?!
15. “O father, do have a change of heart; for you have turned your gaze away from Him Who came to us out of the greatest love and mercy, so He might save us from the eternal night of death!
16. “Behold, father, when we were weak you supported us all with your strength. For that reason, in this time of your weakness, do not reject our hands either, for we want to help you and put you back on your feet again, according to the Father’s holy will!
17. “So, do turn back to Him Who dwells in our midst, and not somewhere far away from us.
18. “O father, behold, He is among us! So turn to Him quickly, amen; yes, yes, very quickly, amen, amen, amen!”
1. As soon as Adam had heard the words of Pariholi, he began to reflect on himself, and he fully recognized the magnitude of his sins before God still hidden within him, which was why the high Abedam did not want to sit down at Adam’s basket. He also realized the great disgrace he had plunged himself into by trying to be worshipped, an unborn man, as a coequal to God.
2. This he now realized; but apart from this realization he also asked his heart: “How am I to blot out this, my most foolish stain in the eyes of the Lord, from my life?
3. “Who will save me now and prevent me from suffocating in the deepest mire of the most egregious dishonor, in front of my God and all my children?”
4. Having harbored these thoughts, he turned to the messenger Pariholi and said to him: “Pariholi, before this you did mention something about a quick change of heart; but I ask you: How can someone who turned so inexpressibly far away from God find it as easy as you, with your lack of experience, imagine it to be?
5. “Could you give me a satisfactory answer to my question? But please, do consider the unfathomable depth of my current, utterly miserable fall.
6. “O you most unfortunate and disgraceful thought, wholly unworthy of my God!
7. “O you most miserable preliminary burning, who inspired you within my heart, that I instituted you, only for it to lead to my present downfall?!
8. “O sun, accelerate your course across the sky, so your rays might no longer put a spotlight on my immense disgrace before the whole earth!
9. “O Pariholi, do you have a comforting word? What can you tell me that could ever raise me up again before God? Where is the quick change of heart you mentioned? What can you tell me and give me now, so I would not thoroughly perish in the face of the immense dishonor holding me prisoner, down to the very roots of this my utterly miserable life?
10. “Pariholi, please speak, speak, speak now, if you can, may and will!
11. “With the voice coming from your chest cover my countenance, lest it be exposed too much to the eye of Him Who dwells among us!”
12. Thereupon Pariholi replied to Adam: “O father Adam, listen, in the name of your and my God, Jehovah, Who is holy, immensely holy, and is now among us, visible to the eyes of any child, however unwashed:
13. “How can you still question the possibility of a quick change of heart, you, being the first freely breathing witness of His endless mercies, being familiar with the endless love of Jehovah by several hundred years more than me; and yet you can still question it?
14. “Behold, the customary preliminary burning instituted by you, whereby you have been honored by us, your children, uninterruptedly for three hundred years, was a secret folly of your heart in the eyes of God. Seeing you languish under the heavy pressure of that burden, He has now shown you mercy, taken this heavy burden from your heart and fully freed you.
15. “How can you, old father, who were the original teacher of us all, still question the possibility of a quick change of heart, even though He has already changed your heart long ago, back when you were still debating with yourself as to what evil might be behind this preliminary burning of yours?
16. “Why do you grow angry in your heart when the Lord, the holy Father, forcibly rids your heart of a mighty and hidden evil?
17. “Or do you perhaps believe that He intends to ruin you by graciously raising you up?
18. “O father, look towards that holiest of spots; behold His eye, His mouth, His arms, stretched out wide in fatherly love and goodness! What sublime love is shining forth from His most holy countenance upon you, father Adam! And yet you still question the possibility of a quick change of heart!
19. “O father, I cannot possibly tell you more about this in the most holy presence of Him Who loudly calls out to you:
20. ‘Adam, My son, why do you tarry so long and do not hurry into the open arms of your eternal, most holy Father, Whose endless love has occupied itself with you for eternities?’
21. “O father Adam, do you still not understand these words?”
22. After these words, Adam jumped up, glowing with joy, and embraced Pariholi; he said to him: “O Pariholi, who gave you these words to say?
23. “Truly, it was not the late evening that brought this heavenly fruit to fruition within you.
24. “So, let us both hurry on over to Him and embrace Him with the brightest flames of our love; for truly, truly, He has now lit both the preliminary and closing fire within my heart! Never before have I felt such an urge to love as I am feeling now; so let us quickly hurry to Him; Him, the most loving, most holy Father! Amen.”